gotta impress the bouncer...

Before kids, you're biggest concern is...

How much alcohol you're going to consume in one night (and still be able to drive home); which rocking ass outfit you're going to wear for the evening; which super cute earrings go with the outfit; how much Advil you need to swallow to prevent a hangover; and how much cleavage you gotta show to impress the bouncer.

After kids, you're biggest concern is...

What Pre-K will be best for my soon-to-be four year old, which teacher will be the best for him academically and personally (and I'm damn picky case I'm a teacher myself); what the Pre-K curriculum looks like (do they teach letter/sound recognition, do they pull small groups for guided reading, do they teach sight words, do they teach writing and stretching words, do they incorporate lots of hands-on math activities and integrate science, social studies, art, and music - or is it just babysitting); and what kind of bribe works to impress the "bouncer" (a.k.a. Principal) so I can guarantee a spot for my kid.

Am I going to have to show some clevage or bake some cookies?